Thursday, 2 January 2014

The return of ham ...

In these times of excessive consumption, mass consumerism and the over extension of my resources … I have decided to do my small part for the environment by recycling this poem from last Christmas.

An Ode to the Christmas Ham

The fridge is full of Christmas Ham,
There's no room there for beef or lamb.
We've kilos of the stuff to eat,
Have some for brekkie....it's my treat.

Now how about a ham cheese roll,
Perhaps some shredded in a bowl.
I'll slice some up...have it for brunch,
Then pack a sandwich for your lunch.

I'll add some to a jatz....you'll see,
It's just the thing for morning tea.
Then later on this afternoon,
I'll feed you some from off a spoon.

Then a pizza topped with ham for dinner,
Is bound to be a sure fire winner.
I'll add some to a quiche tomorrow,
Then put some in a snack to follow.

I'll slice some then...it's just like bacon,
have it with eggs...it won't be faking.
In fritters, hash browns, omelettes...more,
Just keep on eating...there's ham galore.

Then when our blood pressure starts to zoom,
From all the salty meat consumed.
And the Doctor gasps at our fast heart rate,
We'll tell him "Doctor, just one more plate"

We cannot waste our Christmas Ham,
It cost 7 bucks per thousand grams.

By Me


History is currently repeating itself and … unlike a laboratory rat … I have learnt absolutely nothing from my past experiences.

10 comments:

  1. Ha Ha Ha ! Suddenly I really want ham...XO

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Come on over … I've plenty to spare ;0)
      xx

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  2. Ah the Christmas ham, the gift that just keeps on giving! We skipped ham this time round and lived off deserts for a few days. Brilliant poem you clever girl you.

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    Replies
    1. I wouldn't mind living off desserts all year round ;0)
      xx

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  3. We really cut down on the food this year, but still have all sorts of stuff leftover and/or unopened... I blame the Mister for the surfeit of cheese, but he thankfully accepted we just didn't need a ham as well! You're a poet, Jo, as if you didn't know it. xxx

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    Replies
    1. Mind you ham and cheese might have been nice ;0)
      xx

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  4. I had to go the shops today to re-stock on food!! wtf!! send me some of your ham, my lot are like locusts at the moment x x x

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I'll pop it into the post … surface mail … could take a while … will probably be moving about all on it's own by the time it gets there ;0P
      xx

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  5. hilarious! it is a bit like that, the never ending ham!

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    Replies
    1. It's like The Magic Pudding … only saltier ;0)
      xx

      Delete