Tuesday 8 January 2013

H.O.T.......

The temperatures are predicted to hit 43 degrees in Sydney today.....that's approximately 110 degrees in the old money.

Heaven help the western suburbs...which usually mange to climb another 5 degrees or so higher than anyone else.

So I have come up with a few of MY tips for keeping cool.....please note they are totally unendorsed by any authority which may actually know....

  • If you have air conditioning turn it on......as early possible....set your alarm....better yet set Hubby's alarm.
  • Close all windows, blinds, curtains....the more your home resembles a cave the better.
  • Drink, drink, drink....very important to stay hydrated.  However, best not make them alcoholic bevvies....we all know that famous saying..."Only mad dogs and Englishmen and intoxicated Aussies go out in the midday sun".
  • If you have no AC at home I suggest a trip to the cinema.  Pick the longest movie possible....I can personally recommend The Hobbit....which runs for 169 minutes plus trailers and advertising...that should get you through.
  • A day at the shops is a possibility....however....many, many people will have the same plan.  By the time you eventually find a parking spot, fight the crowds inside the shops and not be able to get a table in the Food Hall you will be feeling extra hot under the collar....and any added warmth is not to be recommended today.
  • Wear as little as possible....if you can get away without a bra....do it!  Today is the day for hanging free.
  • Tie any hair below your neck up if possible....I swear for every cm of hair hanging down my neck I suffer an extra degree of body heat....but perhaps that's just me.
  • A personal favourite of my kids.....put your CLEAN undies in the freezer for an hour or so....before donning them for your cooling enjoyment.
  • No physical exertion to be attempted...at all!!  Slothful lounge lying thoroughly recommended.
  • Try to skip work....however, if work has AC, go and try to score a few hours paid overtime while you're at it.
  • Pray for an early onset southerly buster...which has absolutely nothing to do with my dog.
  • If you only have a fan...then I suggest lying on a tiled floor in front of it...while spraying yourself constantly with a water bottle.
  • Do NOT sunbake...this will only result in sunburn and sunstroke...neither of which are pleasant.
  • Remember your deodorant...you might not smell you....but we sure will!
  • Try to enjoy it...it's the one day you can be sure you look smoking hot!
  • If the electricity fails....PANIC.....it's every man for himself!




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